October 01, 2005
I really don’t know what is happening to me at the moment. Working and writting my final thesis.
The prob. is working – i’ve just reliazed that recently i haven’t been able to get my concentration when am working. I couldn’t find anything i wanted in the small office even when it was right in front of my eyes. I couldn’t concentrate on what i were doing, sometimes i do some tasks different from what i’m thinking, which i even don’t reliaze. It seems that i do everything in a slow and not effective way. This is a very serious prob when i can’t control my mind and action. This makes my collegues annoyed, dissapointed and doubtful about my competence also.
I feel so frustrated and stressful now, don’t know what to do and m losing my confidence. It’s no fun, i still have some other things needed to worry about. I don’t know why i’m stuck in this situation. Is this caused by tiredness and pressures? I don’t know, i’ve tried my best for everything, even taking care of myself and giving up some other parts of my daily life. I’ll try to go to bed earlier everyday, before 12 at least and try to concentrate more. Otherwise, i don’t know what should i do but i can’t continue with this situation. It is eating me everyday.
Anyway today is my Mum’s birthday. I’m worring very much about her health. Wishing her all the best from my heart, mind and soul – for the most important person in my life now.